Cursor by itdoesnotexist.com ~*Exaggerated & Nonsensical*~: August 2005

:The current mood of evil_jia at www.imood.com

Monday, August 29, 2005

Please don't shut me out again...

My dear friend,

I have no idea what exactly is happening to you right now. I really didn't know that one issue would have such big an impact on you. Or maybe there's something else happening too... Just stay strong and get well soon, okay? Can you please keep your promise?? Maybe you don't like talking about it.. Maybe you don't want any help at all.. But please know that i'll be here for you. Always. Anytime you need a listening ear or a shoulder to lean on, i'll be here. Just don't pull the disappearing stunt on me again, please? It really hurts. Perhaps what you felt a few weeks ago for me, is exactly how i'm feeling right now, and this is the second time. I hope you understand what i'm trying to say. I care for you, and i hope you do the same for yourself too... I believe what you're going thru' now wouldn't be much worse than mine.. I guess we're both screwed up. You're not alone.

No matter how great the ordeal is this time, please get back on your feet soon. We still have alot to do. Our dates and parties and dreams.. Everything's waiting for us...

** You might not want to listen to any of these, but i'll have to say it still..

i want the old you back...

Had another of my wierd dreams last night.. Actually, it's this morning...

geeZ.. look at the time!
i'm supposed to be in school now!!! but i had a really bad headache when i was awoke by the loud coughing and sneezing and sniffing of my sister early at 0730. aRghz!! can you please be quiet?!?!?! ok, i'm leaving at 1030 for my jap tut at twelve.. i'm not a lazy gal, alright!

Ok. anyway, in my dream, i skipped school too. and shaun too!! he was eating potato chips in my dream.. lol.
then this person whom i knew from JC came to my house.. i shall refer to the person as XX. i remember being super happy to see XX over at my house. XX looked exactly like the first time i saw XX at JC. happy, fun and sweet. and everything was still the same... talking, laughing, joking...

Dream doc.: This is a very straightforward dream. You just want the old XX back.

oh ya, i had this dream after i went back to sleep again.
the second time i woke up, i was delighted. 'coz i thought what had happened was real. but when i see myself in my room again, and i thought about it for awhile... i realised, it was just a dream..

i miss XX.

Can i have the old XX back?????

Friday, August 26, 2005

what's going on???

Recently, i've developed a fetish of talking to myself..

Not exactly aloud or mumbling. more of like, talking to myself and answering myself all in my head.. call me crazy, call me nuts. 'coz i am. But i believe many of you out there do that too, especially when you've no one to talk to, or there's no one who understands you. somehow, i feel that i'm doing it excessively. And the best time to do it? when i'm taking a bath or sitting on the toilet bowl.. oh, and i realised, i'm usually in a daze when i'm waiting for the bus. that's when my brain takes a break..

so you see.. That's why i blog less often now. 'coz everything i wanna say.... i've said it to myself already. and i'm able to blog now, 'coz i'm in front of the computer when i start talking to myself again. but anyway, who cares what i say????? who listens to me?????

i've also been dreaming alot recently. not as in day-dreaming. and the series of dreams that i had, seem to be linked to one another. Cars and trains appear frequently in my dreams. Big resorts, hotels, and the beach, too. the people in my dreams, some i do recognise, but mostly no. and there's always lotsa pple in my dreams. Being the self-proclaimed dream doc. i am, i can only interpret my dreams as a desire to escape. Ah! Escapism, that's what i need. it just suddenly dawned on me. From what, you may ask. but i..... i've no idea how to say it...

hmmm. anyway, sch has started, and tutorials too.. it's week 3 already, by the way. (shannn!!!! do you know it's another THREE weeks to term break?!?!?!?!?! ) yea, so i've managed to get an alternate - 3-day/4-day - week. that's not too bad, considering i was prepared for a 4-day week already. Btw shannn, don't worry too much about your tutorials. Trust me, you'll get used to it soon. You just have to learn to speak up, or you won't enjoy tuts at all. Don't be shy, girl. I was rather apprehensive when i just started last year too. moreover, i'm not the kinda outspoken person too. Just understand your readings and stuff, and you'll be able to participate in tutorial discussions without feeling afraid of saying the wrong things. For the going-to-tutorials-alone part, well, i've been doing that for one whole year already, and i'm still alive! in fact, it's easier to make friends this way, rather than sticking to the only person you know. Just go for your tutorial, look for people who are alone too, and start talking to them. Oh, and i realise that sitting right in front of the class is not a bad thing afterall for people like me. 'coz that way, you'll be able to participate in the discussions without bothering how other people look at you. but then again, that'd have to depend on the sitting arrangement..

sighhh. shann and i didn't get into floorball. does that mean i'm fated to be cca-less in my whole life???? okay, just exaggerating..

i just went to cut my hair... it's so DAMN SHORT now!!!!! erm, once again, i did the multi-layers kinda hairdo. so, the back's long, the top's short, and the sides are short too.. how do i look?? i'm not interested to photowhore.. and i think wearing a hair band makes me look a teeny weeny bit nicer. 'coz the sides aren't there to curl anymore! Kar says he's gonna sponsor 40bucks! hope it's not just another empty promise...

alright, i'm hungry. SO, i shall stop talking to myself for now.

i still have alot more to say, actually..

Thursday, August 25, 2005

just get a life, will ya?

i don't understand why some people have to think that they're having the biggest problem in the whole universe. All they can think about is themselves and their silly lil' problems... wtf. you should count yourself lucky, alright. why don't you quit bothering yourself with all those rubbish, and start doing something meaningful? really, GET A LIFE!




*problems not solved, but life still goes on...
i'm trying hard to get a life!

Is waking up at 0745hrs everyday to do my tutorials a way of life???

Tuesday, August 16, 2005



Life's a joke, and a sad one too.

Friday, August 05, 2005

i'm a bloody tap!!!!

drip drip drip

damn it!
i can't go for spa today, and no swimming for tmr too!!!
=(
'coz i'm a bloody tap...
drip drip drip...

why do i always have to bleed just when i wanna go for spa????????
i want my green tea scrub!!!
i need a D-stressed massage before sch starts!!!

booohooooooooooo

drip drip drip

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

please clean my windows...

My very first biz deal went... *poof!* yesterday... =( haa.

Read this:
A lady wanna clean her sliding windows, but it's kinda difficult as she couldn't reach the outer side. So, she's looking for someone to remove her windows, let her wipe them clean, and install back in place for her.


I thought that was pretty hilarious!!
Nevertheless, being the conscientious lil' assistant secretary i am, i consulted my boss. True enough, my boss laughed as i told him the situation. Gee. So i had to call the lady, and reject her job.

So there goes my first biz deal!