To die or not to die.
nah, don't worry, i'm not thinking of suicide..
There's this program on tv right now, showing a very poor old man.
Poor, not as in monetary terms, but as in, pathetic. Two of his daughters committed suicide, another son and daughter went bonkers, and he doesn't even have a bed at home. He sleeps on those brown cardboards (what do you call that..?)...
It's heartwrenching to know that this part of the population exists. The colourful picture that they try to paint our country with, is indeed a very beautiful picture that says a thousand words, or should i say, lies. These poor souls are tucked away like dirt underneath the bed. Need i say more?
*Note: Yes. I'm evil by nature. But i'm not evil in the sense of being cruel and heartless. I'm just evil, in terms of being mean. And if you're thinking, "I don't see her doing any evil mean stuff...", well, like i said, i'm evil by nature. I don't have to show it. In other words, you can actually call me a hypocrite.
I had a friend whose dad committed suicide a few years ago. For what, i don't know. Maybe he was stressed out by money, or it was just plain depression. Either way, that's so scary, ain't it? Don't you think it's the society that actually drove him to death? The pressure, burden, discrimination, money, family, and whatnot.
But... seriously, it's not worth mourning for a person who committed suicide. That's just dumb. The person committed suicide because he wanted to die, and he is now happy that he is dead, freed from all his troubles. If he doesn't care about people who care for him, why should they mourn for him? In fact, they should be happy for him, if that's what he wants. No? Why should the people who are still alive suffer the loss of a loved one, when that person didn't even think about them when he intended to commit suicide?
Mum's aunt passed away a few days ago. Now, this is a different case, because she died of cancer. She didn't have a choice. She didn't want to have cancer. She didn't want to suffer. I wasn't close to her, but it's still sad.
It's always sad to look at the obituary...
And it's also sad to go back to school for lessons on a saturday. Saturday morning.
Btw shannn, i will only lend you the vcd AFTER the exams.. You better study hard!!!
and yes. i don't watch the same movie twice, unless i don't have to pay for it.. *hint*
as for karaoke, let's do it soon! maybe before we start mugging for the exams???
just leave me alone @ 11:43 PM
3 Comments:
hmmm. i didn't say they don't deserve our sympathy. i just thought if that's the road they wanna take, and if it's really better for them, there's no need to feel so sad. like i said, i think it's the society that causes so much probs for pple. okay, ya, i agree that in the first place they're not sane enough. but when someone comes to the point of thinking of suicide, and actually set on doing it, it's either a Stop and turn back, or a Do it and get done with it...? and yes, when it comes to depression, pple would say, seek help, go for counselling, take medicine, blahblahblah... but in the end, it still depends on the person. whether he wants and accepts help, or he totally shuts out the world. and that's when the person would Do it and get done with it. anyway, i'm not psychologist or doctor, i don't know if medicine really helps. i only know that at the end of the day, it only depends on the person.
oh and, they DO deserve our sympathy, coz they're just poor victims of the fucked up society. but i'm saying, don't have to feel so sad for them, because who knows, all the misery they're feeling... worth the exchange with Death.
and that's the Stop and turn back part.. ask yourself what you were thinking when u did that. ask yourself if you did think of your family and friends when u were doing that. ask yourself if a part of your mind was still sane at that time. and ask yourself now if u're glad u did not do that.
of coz i'll be sad if u do that. and it's definitely not worth it. there are many points of time in life when one feels depressed, and you need to know you're not the only one feeling that. perhaps when u finally see the light at the other end, you would be much stronger. and like i said, in the end, it still depends on individuals, how you wanna face your own problems, and if you wanna go through all these alone.
if one day, u really decide to end it all, tell me how u would want me to feel. if you know that i'd be very sad, and alot more others would be very sad too, would u still go ahead???
i had the courage to do that few years back. whenever i look back now, i smile to myself and am glad i did not do it.
i hope u stay strong too. :)
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